You’ve got mail ✉️...from Soju on actifit

작년

Dear Linny,

This is Soju, the cat, and not my mum @supersoju, the crazy cat lady on Steemit. I’ve been reading her messages to you. Do not believe her claims that she’s a slave in this household.

Dad and I are the slaves.

She is truly the laziest woman on the STEEM blockchain and Earth combined!

Sometimes dad and I check to see if she has a pulse, and the results are always inconclusive! I’m frustrated, I really want to post an actifit report but I can’t. My little brother, robot vacuum, and I are trying to get the steps for her. But then she complains about her ankle.

Her ankle?!

How is that relevant when she wasn’t even the one moving?!

My mum is nutty going on senile; I worry about her. She needs to get off her backside and do real exercise. Not her gimmicky attempts like her latest purchases. She bought a vibrating plate and a sauna suit on my eBay account! Now, I just internally roll my eyes when she’s holding her giant phone standing on her vibrating plate wearing what looks like a garbage bag.

“I’m working up a sweat, Soju!” she’d say. “The harder I’m vibrating, the more steps I’m getting!”

Is she cheating the rules of @actifit?

Does artificially generated movement actually count, Linny?

Why can’t she just go for a walk with her phone like normal people?

Anyway, I know you miss our posts, I’m doing everything I can.

Mum...well....

She’s doing absolutely nothing! Besides giving herself nerve damage from all the unnatural shaking, and potential heat stroke walking around wrapped in plastic!

Here’s an example of her actifit attempts!

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Meeeeeeeeeeow!!
Soju the frustrated cat

My other letters:
My little brother, robot vacuum
My secret life and cool friends
My crypto investment in eBay coins...

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Soju is such a lovely cat! I understand fully her frustration. Her mum should be banned from @actifit and Soju should get all the rewards, maybe a box full of mice! Did you write to @mcfarhat? ;)

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Oh no, we can never ban @supersoju. We’re trying to get her to take actifit seriously! To commit! But I’m not sure if Soju eats mice, she likes weed...

Yeah, maybe @mcfarhat can explain how those activities got onto the list! lol

EDIT: I am feeling your pain too re tired and cold. I am struggling to get on the cross trainer and it’s 10:20 PM here!

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looooool oh myyyy
no way can I explain any of the above, not even the whole new list of acivities in there :D
we might consider exchanging AFIT tokens for mice @actifit-peter lol

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.... AND not to forget you have got at least 25 degrees Celsius at your end! Please send some sun rays over to Europe! :)

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Soju: Meow! Nicely done @linnyplant. Mum is trying to read the post and reply but I am sitting on the keyboard.

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Soju: Grrr mum just called me fatty; I'm not fat, I'm fluffy! Maybe I ought to turn around and give her a bit of a bite.

Soju's Mummy: Really Soju. I can barely type with you sitting over the keyboard like this. Soju is trying to stop me from telling the truth about the ebay purchases. Just because she finally cannot deny the truth that she is a cat after she received the sauna suit. 'Why doesn't this fit me mummy?' she asked. 'Because you are a cat, not a human silly Soju'.

She still cannot accept the truth. Just like the fact that mummy does enough exercise running after her when she escapes and cleaning up after her. I swear she is such a messy eater; just like her daddy.

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Oh no! Don’t call Soju a fatty! You don’t want to start a war... lol.

Dad’s a messy eater? You can try a bib. hehehe. Husband’s and their annoying quirks. Mine is out and about ingressing right now. I just remembered, he wants me to go out on a Ingress adventure with him this morning too. Grrrrrrrrrrrr.

I must keep my responses short this morning. So much to do. But always happy to see you appear. 🤗

Post something! Or Soju will start acting up...

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Then war it is! kekeke

Is Ingress similar to pokemon? I don't play pokemon. But seems like they are similar where you go out and about into the real world to do things?

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Ingress and Pokemen are both developed by Niantic. Yes, is a real world thing. Hubby and I bumped into his ingress pal the other day and we ended up chatting for ages. Typical ingress behavior. :)

Haha, I had to read your post twice, but then I get the joke.\n$rewarding 90% 13min

Posted using Partiko Android

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Oh, it’s not a joke Holger! It really is @supersoju’s cat writing the emails. I’m her only outlet at the moment, since her Mum never posts anymore.

Thank you for enjoying Soju’s letter. She’s a gorgeous cat and doesn’t mind I share her words. Her mum can’t prove it’s really her. She’s a clever cat that one. ❤️