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The Celtic accent was a bit jarring in print, but I guess that's unavoidable. I also think the red-haired witch's plea for mercy was a little bit... well, "cookie-cutter," but other than that moment the dialogue was great. I'm definitely looking forward to reading more.

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Cheers for the feedback! Dialogue is not my strong point so I'm glad that you think it was great, despite the cookie-cutter wailing. As for the Celtic accent... any accents are of your own imagining! :D All I did was a bit a drunk slur on Mother, hehe. :)

Thank you for stopping by! I hope that you will enjoy the next chapter when it's ready to be posted. Which should be in a couple of days. I'm trying to leave a few days to a week between chapters.

I have read both chapters - and let me get a few trivial matters out of the way before I comment.

First of all, your link for the other chapter is not Steemit, but to Steempeak...which means I have to open your home page and click there to read (I do not know why, but steempeak does not open for me). I was wondering why, since you posted on Steemit, why do you want to force your reader to another platform?

Regarding achieving a writer myself, I know that it does not matter how many times I read what I have written. Even after the 20th time, I will still find errors and changes needed so that the reader can understand what I have written about. Do you not have a friend who can read and comment for you? They do not need to be professors of lit. Even just a middling knowledge of the language and grammar, plus an interest in what they are reading and it should suffice for them to point out some of what needs to be improved. Having said that, I did not see any such failures, so maybe you are able to 'read' your own writing with an unclouded eye.

One of the most important lessons I learnt about writing - do not over-think, just write. Even if it is not worthy to be recorded as part of your story, it opens the mind and like a stream undammed, the waterfall of words will carry you back into the magic of unveiling your story. It is easy enough to return to delete what you are not happy with - easier than waiting and hoping the right words will come at that time.

Last point. Thanks to going to your home page, I discovered @steemydave. That means that today has started off beautifully, with the discovery of two minds I envy for the magic they know of in their imaginings.

After the above, you still expect me to comment on your writing? Really?


I have resteemed so that my few readers can see that I do appreciate the writings of those who excel.

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Thank you for stopping by with such a wonderful comment! I appreciate it so much. And @steemydave will be so happy that someone has found his writing! :D He's my partner and has been a bit disillusioned with steem lately. I encourage him to keep on writing though, that there are people out there who do read it and enjoy it, they just don't comment, and sometimes it's hard to comment -- I personally like a lot of things I read but can't articulate what it is I like about them, so curate silently.

I'm sorry though about the steempeak link. I've been using Steempeak to post instead of Steemit for some time now, and sometimes I forget that steemit even exists which is my bad. I'll update the links after I finish this comment. :) I understand -- I get so annoyed when people use links or links! Haha! :D

It's only recently I've come to understand that perfection will never be attained. As a writer, I'm always learning, we're always learning. And if I keep trying to subject myself to such rigorous standards my writing will be killed by over-editing. Which is what happened to Book Two of this series -- I need to try and get my original feel back into it. Luckily Book One comes first!

I share my writing with a couple of other people as I go along, hoping to find constructive criticism. But I don't often receive any. Part of me hopes to find the occasional critique here on steem but I'm not really expecting any. Once the last chapter has been posted here, that's it. Book One complete and ready for self-publishing. not over-think, just write. Even if it is not worthy to be recorded as part of your story, it opens the mind and like a stream undammed, the waterfall of words will carry you back into the magic of unveiling your story.

Another thing I have learnt over the past couple of years! :D Mostly thanks to here on steem, actually. I'm not sure if you're familiar with the @freewritehouse community? I found it difficult at first, but being able to write with the flow and to just keep on writing without stopping to think is truly an amazing ability.

Sorry, I'm writing an essay, haha. But thank you so much for stopping by and enjoying my writing, and for leaving a comment. I don't expect you to leave more comments, haha! But you are always welcome to. :)

And thank you so much for the resteem!


It was a pleasure and I am glad you liked it.

As for @freewritehouse . I have been aware of them for a long time and some friendly (to me) posters like to post there, but it is not my cup of tea.

For characters have survived 12 books of about 20,000 paperback publishing and I am stalled on book 13. I love them all and even meet with them in lucid dreams. Some of their adventures (in their books) I was along with them and then wrote of what they had shared with me. I am copying their diary and they realise it because I keep changing what they I can honestly say that I am the only writer I know of who is loved by his characters (I did warn them it is not a good idea, but they will not listen (lol - when I write like this, some peeps over here think I am nuts.)

I paused in my writing and for over 2 years I have not been writing...because I felt it is urgent that I get my books on the blockchain. When I first joined, I was warned that anything over 2 pages per post means nobody will read. For nearly 2 years I wasted my time sticking to the Steemit limitations. The one day I woke up and realised I had made a big mistake. I opened 3 new accounts:

old(prime) account is : arthur.grafo - where I now post other things, political etc.

arthur.grafo4 for books 01 to 04
arthur-grafo8 for books 05 to 08
arthur,grafo13 for books 09 to 13

These are what I call big posts, of 10 pages each (steem cannot handle anything bigger) and I am close to finishing with book 08 and will then be changing accounts for book 09 and onwards.

I do not expect any steemit member to read, they do not seem to like immersing themselves in the stories they are offered and I have not met any readers here who fall in love with the characters of any of the books.

Still, maybe the blockchain will be useful once I have finished, as I can open a low-cost site with links to my posts....(low-cost as my readers will not be costing me any broadband as they will get my instalments from here.

Now I hear Steemit has been taken over by Tron and they want to migrate us to Tron blockchain, so I do not know whether I have just wasted a few years for nothing.

We'll have to wait and see.

As I get to read your next parts of the story, I will point out any errors...if I see any.

Keep writing, for you do have talent and a vivid imagination. As for your partner, I had sent him a comment, so he should not be feeling so ignored today :)

Either Superman or his parent is called Kael...are you hinting you are related?

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Haha! :) No, no; no Krypton relations here. My name came about when I was playing World of Warcraft a decade ago. There is a character in it named Kael'thas, and when I made my own character of his race it seemed more lore-friendly to have a Kael of my own. And Kaelci was born!

I liked it so much that it's ended up sticking with me all these years. Though it's never mentioned, Alexandria's surname is Kael. And the High Magister of the Isles is Caelin, named after a millennia-old ancestor... Cael.

Still, maybe the blockchain will be useful once I have finished, as I can open a low-cost site with links to my posts....(low-cost as my readers will not be costing me any broadband as they will get my instalments from here.

Hey! :D I was planning on doing something similar at some point. I was hoping to be able to achieve it by using wordpress and maybe some sort of widget that connected to the blockchain and could be displayed on the site, but I couldn't find anything currently available to do so.

There is SteemPress, of course, but that wasn't quite what I was after.

There is always development going on though, and I'm not very code-minded, so I hope that one day something like it will be available.

I will admit that I have seen your diaries from time to time when I peruse the fiction section, but felt too daunted to read them because I felt that they were serialised and I couldn't quite catch up to understand what was happening. In that regard, a website where they are all linked in order will be great for readers interested in reading from the start of the series, from page one, book one, without feeling lost.

With the whole TRON + Steemit thing going on, I'm led to believe that TRON only bought Steemit, the website, not STEEM the blockchain. They are simply now the largest stakeholder in the blockchain. As for what the future holds, I'm anxious about it, but I've had faith thus far and will keep posting here... though I have just removed delegations on the off-chance it's wisest to power down. I truly don't think that the past few years have been wasted though. From my understanding the blockchain will still exist and nothing will change that. Except all witnesses going offline forevermore.

There was supposed to be a chat about it today but being on the other side of the world I missed it, I think it's finishing up now so I'm hoping to read a detailed post outlining everything soon.

I mentioned to my partner that his writing had been read by a real person and to come have a look! He's in the US at the moment though so is a bit busier than when he's here in Australia, but he should see it soon. :D He will be happy!