Helpless life/Why am I always regarded as a troublemaker 被“冤枉”专业户

17일 전

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When I was young, I was in a state of being suspected and misunderstood by my mother for a long time. She always thought of me a troublemaker.

I don’t know if everyone has a similar experience. When a certain item is missing in my house, my mom will quietly ask my dad at home: "Eh? I can’t find this item. Did my son use/eat/drink/?"

In fact, sometimes they are not talking quietly, and they are indeed not afraid that I will hear it, and then there is a shout: Son, have you ever touched XXX?

A small part of the time is my behavior, but most of the time it is not. For example, if they take something away and can't remember the situation, they will reach an agreement: that is, they must have not moved, so it must be me, because there is no other person in the family.

In the next few hours or days, they finally found this object "with no effort", and then they didn't seem to be embarrassed.

Although countless misunderstandings were something I did, it did not affect the next suspicion. This state was maintained from elementary school to graduation from junior high school. Most of the time in high school and college was not with my parents. Later, when they grew up, they might realize that I was no longer that little kid like a random animal.

Objectively speaking, this kind of situation may exist in many families, but the frequency is different, and the way parents express it is different. It did not have much impact on me, but when I was young, I always wanted more. Equal, don’t want to be treated as an ignorant child.


为什么要在“冤枉”这个词加一个引号呢?是因为我觉得这个词其实有点重,我想表达的是我年少时期长期处于被我妈怀疑和误会的状态。

不知道大家是否有相似的经历,当我家少了某一样物件,我妈就会在家里悄悄问我爸:“诶?这个东西找不到了,是不是儿子用/吃/喝/了?”

其实有时候她们说的并不小声,也确实不怕我听见,然后随之而来的就是一声大喊:儿子,你是不是动过XXX?

小部分时候是我的行为,但大部分时候不是。比如他们自己随手就拿走了某样东西并且记不得当时的情景,然后就会达成一致:那就是他们都肯定都没动过,所以一定是我,因为家里没有其他人。

之后的几个小时或是几天他们总算是“得来全不费工夫”的发现了这个物件,然后也不见得他们有尴尬之色。

尽管无数次的误会是我做的某件事,但这也丝毫不影响下一次的怀疑。这样的状态从小学维持到初中毕业,高中和大学的大部分时光没有和父母在一起,后来长大了他们或许就意识到我不再是那个随意动物件的小屁孩了。

客观地说,这种情况或许在许多家庭都是存在的,只是频次不一样,父母表达的方式也不一样,对我来说也没有产生太大的影响,但是年少时总是希望多一分平等的,不希望被当做不懂事的小孩。

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Sometimes, people believe in what they see and in not what they should've known.