Catharsis: Journey to an unknown destination

2년 전

It started here:

I took a vacation and I suddenly woke up.
I remembered why I was alive and what I wanted to do.

I have been in love with the idea of traveling nomadically since I was about 16 years old. I had kind of a rough childhood in some ways, and it led me to do a lot of soul searching in my mid teens. I didn't know exactly what I did want, but I knew that I felt compelled to travel in any way that I could. I remember reading (and later watching the movie) 'Into the Wild' when it came out; and while I don't think I would have done things the same way, it definitely made me feel a bit envious of the journey he had and the people he met along the way.

I am not particularly drawn to the idea of living off of the land in the woods or anything of that sort; the journey is what compels me. People should spend more time experiencing and learning from other cultures. There are so many more people and different ways of thinking in the world outside of the small group of people that are in your immediate vicinity.

For me, it was a recent trip to Japan that reminded me that I was wasting my opportunity. I was starkly reminded of the things that I had really wanted out of life. There are so many incredible places to explore in this world, and I would love to see as many as possible. There are so many incredible people on this planet, and I would love to connect with as many as possible. I probably won't even fully understand them, nor them me.

but I am OK with that!

Every time I ever get a little bit full of myself and I presume for a moment that I know what I am talking about, someone who I've been underestimating steps out and surprises me with a viewpoint I hadn't even considered. Everyone has their own way of looking at things, and everyone has some value to contribute. Even the most loathsome person from my point of view has value to someone. Even people who I can't seem to ever find any common ground with seem to have a way of surprising me and teaching me something new.

The way I see it, every person that I meet is an opportunity to peer outside of my own narrow frame of reference and understand the universe at large. Every new place and experience I have is a window to the grander makings of this world. My short little "vacation" was enough to remind me of my decision to learn as much as possible in my time on this planet and truly experience what the world has to offer.

My problem for the longest time had been that I was letting the opinions of others burden me. My family thought that I needed a traditional lifestyle with all the staples: a degree, wife and kids, lots of debt. I wanted to travel then as I do now. When I was ~21-2 years old (after I was financially stable enough) I had taken a trip to Buenos Aires with plans of moving there and my grandfather gave me a list of "20 ideas that are better than moving to Buenos Aires". It was full of "awesome ideas", my favorite of which was (and this is heavily paraphrased) "find a rich lady, seduce her into marrying you, and life the lifestyle".


Get Dat Gold!

WOW! I COULD HAVE BEEN AN ASPIRING (male) GOLD DIGGER.

Thanks for the advice!

And while it didn't stop me from going, it DID stop me from moving there. I reneged on my plans to stay and came back, my heart heavy with the thought of disappointing the people who have been there for me all of my life. I knew I needed to go, but obviously going extreme was off-limits. I moved out of state (Illinois to Arizona) as a sort of half-measure.

Going to Arizona wasn't the worst thing for me. I spent a lot of time hiking in the mountains and trying new things. I even met a few wonderful people that I am lucky to have in my life, but the drive to travel and see the world has never gone away. I just ended up in the same situation as before I moved, where I feel that I am not accomplishing my main goal in life. Except this time it was more based on my own self-imposed restrictions.

The people that I have in my life now are pretty much nothing but supportive of me. I am actually shocked how much they are supporting me through this, because it is somewhat of a foreign concept to me.

Just another time when I am surprised by the people around me.

So my mindset has changed. I realized that the only thing really holding me back was myself. The people who say that you can't live your dreams are just too scared to try for themselves. There's a fair amount of risk in anything that you do, so why not take the risk on something that will fulfill you?

Anyways, I booked a plane ticket to Buenos Aires as it was the original destination for me. I'm kind of here for reasons other than just travel, but it's a jumping off point for me. There's a lot to see and do here, but it's not my main destination. It's more of a personal preference thing because I was mainly interested in seeing Asia and Europe. Plus any time that I spend here is going to have other goals (family & friends), so it will be a bit less about the travel. Looking forward to seeing the Andes Mountains, Igazu falls, and the other provinces at some point, but that may not be for a while as it stands right now.

I'm not exactly sure what the future holds, or where I will end up going, but that kind of the point isn't it? It seems more enjoyable to embrace the unknown and be fluid as things happen, rather than fretting over the future and becoming frustrated if anything deviates from the path you had imagined.

My family would probably still prefer that I go to college and become some celebrated professional, but I have always been the oddball. I need to live my life by what drives me -- No more, no less.

I think that's true for everyone. Whether it's you, me, or jim jon, we all should be living and doing the things that drive us. All of the advice of the people who care about me might be with the best of intentions, but I do not see the world the way that they do. I am not driven by the same interests that they are.

You are likely not driven by the same things that I am. So you try your best to build your dreams into reality, and I'll try my best to do the same. That's the only way to be that makes any sense in this crazy world.

Nothing is a failure as long as you've learned or gained experience from it, and as long as you're progressing, every day is better than the last.

-- Brains

(Braaaaiiinnnsss)

P.S.

I'm going to be doing a lot more of my own pictures whenever possible. Hopefully the quality will improve as I learn how to not suck, but if you have any advice feel free to let me know. Thanks.

Image Sources:

#1 - That's me, dude
#2 - link
#3 - Taken the other day from a balcony

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Did you have a good time ?

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This post received a 1.5% upvote from @randowhale thanks to @spacehd! For more information, click here!

I completely agree @brains. You have got to live a life based around living your own life and pursuing your own dreams. This is what I call "Living a life worth living" or "Be Now not later." To not do this would be to live out of alignment with your identity and this always leads to an unhappy life.

Good luck with your travels! I'm sure the adventure is going to be something you never look back and wish you hadn't taken the first step.

I followed you because I'm thinking that your probably going to take us all on a fantastic adventure! This is the type of stuff that inspires me to make my own dreams a reality and of course it's the people doing extra that are exceptional. That's good energy to be around so please continue to share your life journey with us here on SteemIt! :)

"Where you focus... that's where your future shows up"

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It's terrifying to make the first step, but I think that everyone should follow their dreams if they have the opportunity and will to do so. Thank you for the positive vibes ;)

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F.E.A.R. is False Evidence Appearing Real. I remember the times when fear was very real for me... Until I realized that it was far more painful to ask myself "What if?" Imagine getting to the end of your life and realizing that you didn't actually do what you wanted to do.

Often it takes a S.E.E. (Sudden Emotional Event) to move people into acting on their dreams... But I have been learning that it's better to chose your values and thereby the type of pain you will experience. At least this way you get to chose.

So much of life is about sacrifice. Life at its core is all about choosing... and as soon as you choose a direction you immediately sacrifice something. Coming to grips with this aspect of life and living can be frightening... But I have always looked at it like this...

Everyone thinks that they are living secure and safe lives... Its not until you realize that life isn't safe and secure at all. That's an illusion. We have all jumped out of the airplane with out our parachutes on... It's something we all have in common so I find it sort of humorous to see people living their lives as carefully as they can when in actuality... They don't have their parachute on at all!

Yes... It's all about calculated risks... But life is risky... and fortune favors the bold and brave!

For me it's all about setting longevity goals in alignment with my authentic self and really focusing on the values I want to care about during my life time... After that is set it's more about throwing yourself into the things that inspire you and give you life every single day (doing it every day compounds your results!) and allowing the rest to fall away. I subscribe to the less is more mindset.

Something I learned is that positive energy is twice as powerful as negative energy... if you train your mind to think in this regard that is.

Got any feedback/insights for me?

Stepping forward takes a lot of guts some days and I have realized that so much of where I am today is because of the support (or lack thereof) from the people around me. I'm trying my best to remain open and SteemIt has been fantastic for this! :)

Hope my thoughts inspire you to continue stepping forward! :)

Great post!

dude. After I watched In To The wild I literally walked around the city with no shoes on for two weeks.... it was shortly after my dad died and I found it a very inspiring and disturbing story. I knew that I wanted to break out of the confines of city life but at the same time, I was terrified of the consequences. Somehow through life you learn to let the pendulum swing in to various extremes until you find your own personal middle ground: not necessarily a safe option, but a balanced option which feeds your sense of well being and gives you a rich experience of life. Keep on exploring brother! full power! :)

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Yeah, I had a lot of troubles in my life around the time that movie came out and it had a pretty big impact on me as well. I'm pretty happy to be making the moves that I am in my life. Really cool to hear from you, Thanks.

Ive always wanted to travel like this but I had a kid when I was very young. Now that hes older Ive been thinking of going to for a real journey. Like in the rain forest or the savhanna or something. Great post! Keep following your dreams!

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Sometimes life is like that, but you're never too old to start something new. ;) Thanks!

Great writing!

Nice post, quite daring. :)
Good luck on your trips.

Great post and awesome picture lol!

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I appreciate that, your princeliness.

Very good post keep it up =)
Upvoted

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Thank you much! I appreciate it ;)

I enjoyed reading your post. I have so much identification with you. Most people don't share your level of awareness. I am so impressed that you are also so young. It took me such a long time to even begin to ask myself relevant questions. Following my intuition has never let me down. And yes I agree new and fresh perspectives come from some unlikly people, places and things.