Tales of extraordinary dullness

2년 전

I was walking into the city centre today, with my hearphones plugged to the cellphone playing a nice, happy music.
I took care to place it into a very deep pocket of my backpack and closed it the velcro.

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Suddendly I felt my bag being pulled and the melody stopped.
I immediately turned back and saw a super old, mummy-like man slowly trying to hide my cellphone in his pocket.
I easily took it back, while he said in a broken, wrong italian: "Oh! It fell down. This yours?"

Well, I don't usually take anything for granted as everything is possible.

So: It is possible that my phone indipendently managed to open the velcro and jump out of its pocket, creshing on the concrete without a sound and without even getting a scratch.

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It is possible that the exaggravating slow-moving guy managed, in the span of a second, to: bend to the floor, pick the phone, stand up again, give a look around to make sure the owner was out of sight and honestly decided to take it with him planning to make a couple of phone calls to my contacts, hoping to trace me and give it back. - but later -.

It is even possible that Santa actually exists and that our parents always lied to us in order to take credit for the presents.

It is possible, but is it likely?

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I decided it wasn't. I decided more likely he just pickpocketed my phone.

And, as he kept saying, stolidly like a cow badly hit on the head, and despite all the evidences:"it was on the floor! Oh! It was on the floor!" I blurted: "Stop it! You're a tief! And you're also stupid!".
Then I made a tongue to him and turned back with indignation.

The music resumed and a thought crossed my mind: People like him is entitled to vote and this, legally and socially, affects my life.
I quickly tried to calculate how many people like him I met in Naples and bursted out laughing.

But, let's look at the bright side: I swear, every time I bump into someone like him, out of my exactly on average Q.I., I do feel like a genius ;)

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Lucky you were listening to music, thefts like these are very common in my country, and I've learned to always put on some music whenever I'm in closed spaces with a lot of people.

And it's also possible that shaking a plate of jello doesn't look like a fat hooker on a cold night, no?

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Nice post.

Namaste, Jaichai

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Ahahahah! Everything is possible, Jaichai!

Oooh, similar thing happened to me sometimes ago. Someone tried to pick-pocketing me. Lucky I have good reflexes. I hit the guy right on the eye. Lol. And he ran away.

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Ahahah! Next time he will think about it twice, I guess :D

You need this:

Bobby Anti-Theft Backpack - https://amzn.to/2NbvqQS

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ahahahh! This would solve a lot of problems

Sucks that happened. Very funny storytelling I love it.

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I'm ok, I managed to get my phone back, so no damage :)
I just feel apalled

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@creepyturtle That's good. I don't blame you I would be too.

Haha that was fun to read :)

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Glad you liked it :)

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