It was a beautiful Sunday morning where the sun shines out. I guess I had pleasant dreams; after a short stretch, I walked out of the bedroom and quickly passed through the hallway and headed into the Hall. Zeynep was sleeping on cushions at the corner of the Hall. Zeynep and my housemate Tuğ were lovers. Even though they had no such claim, the fact that Zeynep stayed in our house more than her own, strengthened this belief. Zeynep was a bookworm, and Tuğ was an uncompromising computer wolf. They didn't seem to be related to each other; I've never seen them sleep in the same room, even suspected of having sex. Zeynep must have fallen asleep at night reading a book; I took the e-book reader on her belly and put it aside, and I covered her with the Mini-Mouse-patterned blanket that I knew she had the same in her house.
She didn't notice the procedures I applied to her; she was sleeping like a log. I went into the kitchen to prepare breakfast for the household. I felt energized; I took tomatoes, cucumbers, peppers, herbs, and carrots out of the refrigerator. I made a giant salad dish by adding olive oil, lemon, and salt. In small plates, I prepared cheese, green olives, butter, cream, and honey and carried them to the table in the Hall. I took the breakfast plates, the forks, and put them on the table with care.
Before calling Tuğ and Zeynep, I looked at our breakfast table. The table didn't look like it belonged to poor people, so I didn't feel like I was unemployed. I had a high level of energy. I could have solved my problems in this period. Unemployment leads you to lethargy, and you get miserable because it prevents you from getting into the business. When you're unhappy, you don't want to do anything; you walk around broke and lonely. I poured some of the boiling water in the teapot without a rush. Since the tea would be brewed in ten minutes, it was time for me to wake them the household; they would wash their faces and be ready to sit on the table. It was enough for me just saying to Zeynep, "come on, Zeynep." Because she was a kind and thoughtful person, although she loved her morning sleep, she did not object to being awakened. Tuğ was, of course, a very different person. I said, "Get up, get up, breakfast is ready." "Come on, get up," I trembled again, and then I started to pull his foot. He tried to get rid of me by saying, "Fuck you, little cow." I laughed at the word 'Little Cow' and kept pulling his foot. He kept hoping for sleep and said, "Leave me alone, you worthless bastard." And I liked the words "worthless bastard," and I pulled his left leg with all my strength, and I dropped him out of bed. When he finally opened his eyes on the ground, he was surprised to see Samet, the housemate he just blasphemed, standing on top of him.
"I'm your roommate," I said.
"You are barbaric, my son, you are savagery like orcs," he said as he stood up.
"You don't remember what you said, do you?"I asked him.
“Fuck you," he said.
I said, "You should be at the table in five minutes, Zeynep got up too."
"You're like a retired colonel," he said, stretching like a cat. I went back to the kitchen saying, "we'll talk about it at the table." I cooked the omelet with cheese, filled the tea with cups, fried the bread, carried them to the table, and sat on the table with Zeynep, who returned from the bathroom. Soon, Tuğ appeared at the entrance of the hall like a victorious commander. He was moving towards us in joy on the cleaning robot he treated as skateboarding.
Zeynep asked to our thirty-year-old child "That is unbreakable?"
"No device cannot be broken. Of course, not everyone can find the necessary codes. Bonanza found it."
"I've never seen you praise me like that once," said Zeynep. Thanks to his AI based friend Bonanza, Tuğ installed a program to the cleaning robot to carry himself. Besides, the cleaning robot was strong enough to carry him.
When I saw everyone sitting on a table and having breakfast, I was enjoying it like a family man of forty years.
"What is this gas you have in the morning, did you make a lover?" asked Tuğ.
"If you receive a message that can create positive acceleration and your soul also participates in it, you can create a self-sustaining positive cycle."
"What are you saying, my son, speak Turkish," he said, somewhat angry.
"I got an invitation from an angel investor who supports new business ideas, and I have a meeting tomorrow."
"They'il give you free advice and send you back. Look at the sons of bitches, and they call themselves Angels."
Zeynep warned Tuğ by saying, "let's not engage in sexist humiliations."
"I know those bastards' lungs. First, they give hope, then they reject and do ego masturbation."
Zeynep understood that Tuğ was not trainable, so preferred not to hear the word 'bastard.' She asked me "I wonder, what is the idea?"
"I'm gonna make matchmaking on a digital platform."
"They did it, man, you're 15 years late," Tuğ said.
"Do you know anyone who found his girlfriend through such an app?"I asked him.
"I don't know many people, only you and Bonanza."
“They're having a gay relationship with Bonanza,” said Zeynep, who didn't like to be put on the same boat as him.
”It's not fleshy like you, it's just software code, " said Tuğ.
I said, ”I would have made love with him if he was fleshy."
Zeynep responded to my joke with a dimpled smile.
“Don't be jealous, sit down and make your own Bonanza,” Tuğ said.
“That's exactly the kind of preparation I'm in. I've been working on the algorithm for a month. My faith grew as I tried to write code.”
”I'm not interested in who's going to make love with who," he said with a determined voice.
Zeynep turned to me and asked, “Do you add alum to his meals?”
”I think his bird cannot fly because it is not fed properly, " I said. I've never heard Tuğ talk about a girl, and when he said "I am not interested," it was so obvious he was sincere.
Tuğ did not like the comments about his sexual habits; he said: “Turn it on and laugh at your own ass."
“Don't you think he's so cute when he is angry, look at the straight blond hair coming down to shoulders, he's like a Swiss scientist,” I said, looking at Zeynep. Then I went back to Tuğ and said, “What kind of coffee can I serve to my handsome friend?”
”You prepared the breakfast, let me make the coffee," said Zeynep.
”Let this little donkey get it ready, it is his job," said Tuğ.