What's been happening - stress, stress, stress

2년 전

I'm gonna write everything in one go, so if I make any grammatical mistake, which I'm probably gonna do, I'm sorry.

I haven't been publishing in a few days so I thought I should write a really small and simple update to let you know what happened and when I'm gonna publish again.

Long story short - I got a job.

In the past few days I had to go to the interview, which was stressful, gather a lot of paperwork, which was really damn stressful, go to my first day at work, which was stressful as hell, and then worry about the future, which is even more stressful.

In short, I'm under a lot (maybe too damn much) stress, and it's quite hard to handle it all.

Maybe it's me expecting too much. Basically, I'm mad that I don't know how to do everything that is required from me at the job from the first day. Stupid, but it's something that bothers me a lot.

Maybe it's me not being happy with how I'm spending my time just to get some money. Maybe it's me just hating the idea that I failed as a freelancer. Again, I'm not sure yet. But it does bother me a lot.

And all that, plus the stress that I don't know enough, plus having to go to a job where I don't know 90% of the things that I kinda have to do, results in me not having enough time to invest into the things I like because I worry too much about the job and I try to learn in my spare time.

Basically, the past week was a mess, a horrible one, both emotionally and physically, so that's the reason I haven't been writing and publishing any article. It's also the reason why I didn't code almost anything, why I didn't write my weekly update, and why I didn't do anything creative.

Not sure what's gonna happen in the near future. I may have to reduce the amount of articles I'm publishing, and instead of publishing daily, I may start publishing once every few days. I'm also gonna have to make sure I have enough time for coding and 3D modelling.

I'm not even sure if I'm still gonna have the job in a week or two, but that remains to be seen.

Anyway, just wanted to let you know that I will start publishing again, one way or another, once my stress levels go down a little, once I start to rest a little bit better and once I'll start to have more free time at my disposal.

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