Being a better parent does not mean that you must be a super selfless person. Of course, parenting is about taking care of your children and being there to teach, coach and help them develop skills. But, it is also about feeling better about yourself. You can be the best parent in the world but if you are miserable inside your heart, your actions will reflect on the people around you and the kids. So, to be a better parent you must learn to be happy with your inner state of being and then move out of your comfort zone to share that happiness with the people close to you.
If you are going to prove the better parent standard then you have to start from within. To be a better parent you have to be able to put yourself in your child's shoes so that you can understand what they are going through when it comes to school, peer pressure and other issues. This may mean that some of your priorities will have to change or you will have to be willing to compromise on certain things. For example, if you are fighting with your ex over joint custody, you may have to realize that your kid is suffering too. He or she has not been given any special treatment and that is really hurting his or her developmentally.
The best parent knows how to prioritize their time with their kids. The best parent realizes that one day they won't be there to watch over the little ones because the little ones will be old enough to take care of themselves. To be a better parent, you have to get better at prioritizing and delegating. It is OK to spend a little time focusing on your own needs when times are tough. Just remember that you are there to teach, coach and help your kids grow up well.
The second part to prove the better parent standard is to spend more time with your kids during the day. There are two ways you do this. You can do it via mediation and/or family court. If you use mediation you work with an independent party who is neutral and helps you to negotiate on your behalf. In mediation you are able to get a fair hearing where the mediator(s) consider what's in the best interest of the child or children involved. If the family court is used, you will have to convince the court that sole custody is in the best interest of the child.
If you do both of these things, you are a better parent. You show that you can prioritize your time with your kids. You have shown the court that you are committed to taking care of the child (Ren). Now if you have sole custody then you will be expected to be there every day of the year with them. Unless you have a job that allows you to work full time without supervision, you will have to be there 7 days a week providing meals, supervision, and activities. Here is what happens if you go through sole custody.
First off, as the primary caregiver you will have to change your behavior. One of the easiest ways to do this is to become a very good example. Even if you have never done this before it can help you become a better parent because your kids will be exposed to your emotions and how you feel. If you have never been a good example yourself, then it will help you immensely to take the time to better yourself and teach your kids the right and wrong behaviors.
Also another good thing about being a better parent is that it will help you become a better spouse as well. This is because being a good spouse means that you will have to make mistakes. And by making mistakes you will learn from them. If you don't learn from them, you will make them over again. So, being a better parent will help us be better spouses.
Now some may argue that dads have it easier when it comes to raising their children than moms do. But this isn't true. Dads still have to be a good parent in order to be able to raise well. There are many tips and strategies that fathers can use that even mothers could use in order to raise better children. By taking the time to figure out what works for you, becoming a better parent for your child will become easier.