A Penny for Your Songs (1)

2개월 전

A few days ago, as per usual, I was lurking around the Steemit platform, distractedly looking over some of the posts by my favorite creators, when I found myself engaging in a lovely conversation with @honeydue about Steemit, about interactions and, among other things, about the value of sharing with other people, specifically through music.

Now, I'm the first to admit to never taking too seriously the whole Steemit game, not being much of a content creator, and probably being too lazy to try. I've been around on and off for a couple of years now, but I've mostly limited myself to commenting and posting a couple of old photos just for fun (and recently playing a couple of the most popular games). I've been told countless times by other members of the network "you should start posting your own stuff", and "you have to find your own niche!" but until now, nothing had really sparked in me the interest to do so. The aforementioned conversation, however, made me realize that, indeed, I don't have much to lose in putting myself out there. At worst, people won't read what I have to say, and I'll have lost a few minutes of my (not very) valuable time.

More importantly, though, it made me realize how much I really miss communicating through music. As honeydue said in her own post (which I will link at the end of mine, it's only fair since I'm the one following suit), we all have songs that have a special significance for us, or a special memory attached. Sometimes we take a song at its face value and we just like it for what it is, sometimes we reinterpret what the artist was trying to say by applying it to our own life, sometimes we were just listening to it in a specific circumstance. We might appreciate the lyrics or the poetry, or we might just skip those entirely and just perceive the broad emotions that melody and sounds are capable of conveying directly.

The thing is, I've always had the conviction that when someone is capable of understanding what we feel when we listen to a song or a piece of music, or when we meet someone who somehow feels the same things, we create strong connections. Stronger than what we would create through words alone, because no explanation is precise enough to substitute for the real thing: emotion, experience. And God, I miss that kind of sharing. That says something about my personal life, probably, but that's a story for another time.

What matters now is that I've decided to start posting some of the songs that somehow matter to me. Keeping it simple, one or two songs per week. They might be songs that are or have been especially meaningful to me, or they might just be something that I listened to during the week and have provoked some thoughts. Hence, the title (encouraging you people to leave a penny...ahem). I don't have a specific genre in mind, but I've been a metalhead for a long time, so some songs will lean a bit on the hard 'n' heavy side. Sorry guys.

I've thought long and hard about what song to choose to initiate this little tradition of mine. My mind has finally decided for a song by Pain of Salvation, called Undertow.

This song has the habit of coming up regularly in my life, like I'm living in some kind of a loop, making the same choices that inevitably lead me at the same point. The album it's taken from, Remedy Lane, is one of the best things ever written about love, sex, relationships and self-awareness. Daniel Gildenlow is definitely my favourite songwriter and vocalist. Hell, he might as well be my favourite person on earth. He has this way of giving voice to my thoughts, sometime even before I realize they're there.

Without further ado, here's the song:

I'd love to hear your comments on the song, or for you to post your favorite songs. Actually, feel free to expand on the concept. I don't know if someone IS actually going to read the wall of text I've written (told ya I'm not much of a content creator, heh) but I'd love to further encourage a little bit of 'emotional' music sharing on the platform.

As promised, the post by honeydue:
https://steemit.com/music/@honeydue/sharing-shards-of-yourself-on-music-and-badass-women

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Hey :) So glad you decided to do this. Sorry for the late reply, I took a break from Steem for the weekend.
I tend to come back to the same songs over and over, too. And it's interesting, especially after a while, to listen to a song, see how it affected you then and how it impacts you now. I often find lyrics change their meaning for me over time.
I think music is a good way to track your progress through life. To ground yourself and find true north, you know?

I really enjoyed this song. I didn't know the band and I'm listening again now whilst reading the lyrics for better understanding. It's very emotional and I feel it, you know, guess it connects to a desperation or some sort of feeling inside me. And the melody is just perfect to let go for a bit, to lose yourself. Thank you for that :)

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Don't worry about that, I hope you had a good weekend :)
I had a feeling you'd get it, and I was kinda hoping you'd reply at some point, to be honest :O
What you said about music being a way to track progress is extremely true, and I've had that feeling many times.

But, that's exactly why this song hurts so much, because it makes me feel like I'm making no progress at all. It never really changed its meaning for me: it's about feeling caged and wanting to break free, but knowing that breaking free has dire consequences, for myself, for other people. It will hurt. But it will be right.

I'm alive, and I am true to my heart now, I am I, but why must truth always make me die?

Thanks for your reply :)

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Yeah, some songs are like that, I guess. Some songs never get easier to listen to and those are, I think, the hardest to share with others. Because it's a really private and often not-so-nice part of you that you're sharing...
Still, those have their purpose, too, I guess. You need to know someone else gets it. And sometimes you just need to wallow or be with your thoughts and figure out where to next.

I don't know what you mean by breaking free, but if it's something you feel would make you happy, you should do it. Too many people live caged in their own unhappiness and refuse to find a way out, even though it would be better for everyone involved...

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Yeah well, as you said, life has a way of making you feel caged sometimes. That song is a climax, he starts off by saying he just want to be free, but then he admits that the freedom he looks for is more of a leap in the dark, a self-destructive action. An energy that he's been keeping suppressed and that might go in unpredictable directions. I've been going through some hard stuff lately I guess, and that desire has been coming back to bite me, every once in a while. But I guess that exploring this would become very personal and long (and probably incredibly boring) very quickly, and I feel it would be a bit out of place here :)

And it would kinda defeat the purpose, right? I guess your answer somehow made my point. You got something about me not through my words or explanation, but through music, willingness to listen and the sensitivity to understand. I'm truly thankful for that.

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There's this quote I really like by Warhol,

Sometimes people let the same problem make them miserable for years when they could just say, "So what."
"My mother didn't love me." So what.
"My husband won't ball me. So what.
"I'm a success but I'm still alone." So what.
I don't know how I made it through all the years before I learned how to do that trick. It took a long time for me to learn it, but once you do, you never forget

I try to keep it in mind whenever I feel swamped. Reminds me change isn t that far away.
Life is unpredictable. That's what keeps a lot of people stuck in place, the fear of the unknown and how that something might be worse. It might also be great. You don't know, you have to risk it.

Glad this helped in some way. You're right, you get a lot about a person when you keep an eye on their playlist. And the better you know someone, the easier it is to understand where certain ideas/lyrics apply in their heads. Anyway, hope you find the change you're looking for.

Posted using Partiko Android

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Huh. You hit a nerve there, I guess. Love the quote, so true. The thing is, the "so what" philosophy only gets you so far. Don't get me wrong, I'm a strong believer in not taking shit too seriously. I'm not really the brooding type, although in hindsight, I might have given that impression. But if you make it a habit, at some point, you just get disconnected from everything. Yourself included. Nevertheless, the lesson you took from it, what you said about risking it, might be one of those things I just don't seem to ever learn. Again, hit a nerve.

You know, if you keep this up you're gonna be having me blabbering about life for days. Maybe next weekend I'm gonna post something happier, how's that sound? :D

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Totally, I agree. Just helps to save your broody moments for truly important moments, things that really need some brooding, you know? Important to find balance, as with anything.

I'm glad I hit a nerve :) Again, hope you find whatever it is you're looking for. I don't think it's something you can learn, in the sense that I don't think it gets easier as time wears on. On the contrary, actually, the older we get, the more stuck we become, you know? more comfortable, even though our present situation isn't all that comfortable to begin with...
It's always hard to risk and easier to stay. Guess it's just about you figuring out what's worth more - staying or going.

Depends how you feel next weekend :D I find music does weigh a lot on one's mood. If you listen to wallowy music, you're gonna wallow. If you listen to spit in your face music, you'll get a more cheery attitude about the world. I know I do ;)

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They say with age comes wisdom! You should be about 70 by my estimation.
But yeah, jokes aside, you feel like time is passing and you have to take a stance, right? "might as well stay on the path I've chosen". I'll figure it out, no doubt. Me & Myself have been through worse!