100 Days of Poetry / Day 77 - Dance forever / Plesati zauvijek - Original poetry

3년 전

- Dance forever -

I see you
In the moonshine,
With your silk castle,
Dancing with your love
And my spirit.

I feel you
In the desert, designing
Tornados of sand.
I know you see me
Between the grains.

Talk to me,
Like my love wants to
Get to know you,
Dance with your
Body and soul.

See me,
Look deep into my wholeness.
Get to know me better,
I will play your songs
With my guitar.

Let's dance,
Dance the dance forever.
Attach yourself to me,
Forever
And ever.





- Plesati zauvijek -

Vidim te
Pod mjesečinom,
U svojem svilenom dvorcu,
Plešeš sa svojom ljubavlju
I mojim duhom.

Osjećam te
U pustinji, dizajniraš
Tornada od pijeska.
Znam da me vidiš
Među zrnima.

Pričaj sa mnom,
Kao što moja ljubav želi da
Upozna te,
Pleše sa tvojim
Tijelom i dušom.

Vidi me,
Pogledaj duboko u moje biće.
Upoznaj me bolje,
Ja ću svirati tvoje pjesme
Na gitari svojoj.

Zaplešimo,
Plešimo ples zauvijek.
Pridružite se s menom,
Zauvijek
I uvijek.




1st pic
2nd pic
3rd pic


Shout out to @d-pend for making this beautiful 100 day Poetry challenge. Thanks for your support and for your time you give. Much Cosmic Love.

Anyway, thank you all for reading and for your support! I will appreciate any feedback. Feel free to speak your mind, I'm open to all suggestions and critics, and I will take time to think about them seriously.


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LOL, now this is just weird but not intended SMH read my new poem ... synchronicity is a very strange thing ...

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what's with the desert, you two?! lol
You can come and visit Tunisia if you love deserts so much :D

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Wait for us in the desert with two desserts :D We coming :)

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OMG OMG OMG :D :D I can't believe! :D Who knows if this is a first time we synchronized :D :P

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Another notch on the stick of days for your poetry. Very nicely done.

And I'm sure the picture on top was taken less than 50 miles from me. But I rarely see women in evening clothes there....

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haha Tom, you need to look between the grains :D :D It's there hihi

So since i got you as weekly report person I am going to do my review on this piece. First of all how funny is it what we both wrote about desert and love on the same day, Lol now to the piece itself. Over all I like it and its imagery although i feel that some might not translate completely to English.

I see you
Under the moonshine,
With your silk castle,

the under the moonshine seem odd to me if this were my piece I would most likely no use under or moonshine. But more likely in the moonlight or in moonlight. Also i am not sure about the choice of the silk castle but that is more just me .

In the desert, designing
Tornados of sand.

I know what you mean by this and it is nice imagery but tornadoes is not the right term we call them sand devils but it is not the right term either ...I know those things have a name but I can't seem of to think of it ...will get back to you o it if I remember.

I know you see me
Between the grains.

I really liked this line :)

Dance the dance forever. Attach yourself to me, Forever And ever.

there is nothing wrong with these lines really but damn that would scare me that sounds more like demonic possession to me than love ...attach yourself to me ? (drain my life force @_@ ) > "Help" whimpers and runs ;)

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Yeah I wanted to say in the moonshine, I don't know why I said under.. Probably I was thinking also about under the moon, so I mixed those two... I will edit that...
Silk castle is like her silk dress.. I see it that way and I'm sticking to that hihi

It's not demonic hahhaha :D <3 It will not drain you, it will just share your life force with her. So, by attaching, she attaches to him, and he to her... It's a about sharing haha

<3

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@_@ I see sharing like a flow people flowing in and out of each other like water ..but attaching ? Your protagonists are vampires eating each other ...*hides deeper under rock :P *

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hahaha vampires can love too :D You can run but you can't hide hihi