I MARRIED SUNDAY BECAUSE OF MONEY AND AM REGRETTING IT TODAY

2년 전

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Dec 19th 2011 and that has been the biggest mistake I will ever make in my life which caused silent crying to me and I don’t know when this cry will end.

I met Sunday on 21 March 2009 and we started dating. Seriously I didn’t love Sunday much but he spent money on me. He will buy everything I needed even includes my underwear; I don’t think anything is wrong with that?

I was 27 when we met While Sunday was 33 and am the second born in my family. My mother has been disturbing me to bring home my fiancé but she always say it loudly “Ma lo mu eni tio jeun kanu wale mi oooo” (Don’t bring someone who cannot feed himself to my house oooo) And when I met Sunday it was an answer to my mother’s prayer because Sunday was working in a bank and earning good money. He has two cars then and was living in 3 bedroom flat apartment in Ikoyi Lagos.

This is the kind of life I want for myself. Though my parent is not rich but we are okay because we can still afford to eat whatever we want to eat then and my father’s business was going fine and my mummy too.

After 5 months in our relationship, I can feel it that I didn’t love Sunday but I was able to manage that relationship with money. The day he came to my house I was not around and he met my mother, when I came back my mother was so happy and she said to me: O ti moju lo oja, that is (You have found a good thing)

She was not even care if Sunday is a child of God, if he came from a good family all what she cares for is; he has money. She started calling Sunday everytime. Anytime am with my friend she will call to ask if am with him. After like 9months of that relationship Sunday borrowed money in the bank and gave me to start business when I finished my service. Wow! So, I can be so lucky that a man will give me 800k to start a business.

I was so happy, I told my mum, she called him and prayed for him very well. I begin to love Sunday more and I can see that he is a child of God because he attends church regularly but something was telling me that Sunday is not my husband.

What else do you want in a man? Lara my friend told me that when I told her that am not comfortable marrying Sunday. Not that I was in relationship with any one, in fact! I don’t have time for any man then but I can’t deny my feeling, am not too close to God but I can see that God was giving me a sign.

When our relationship clocks a year that my parent was asking me what is the next line of action. I was disturbed and I don’t have an option than to share the story with my pastor. He encouraged me to have 3days fasting and prayer which I did. Our pastor will never tell you anything even If God show him something, he will want you to pray yourself and know the mind of God.

After my fasting and prayers, I called him to tell me what I saw in my dream and he said my dream is related to what he saw about me. (I will not write what I saw in that dream to save the time) My pastor advice me to pray more and he said God will connect me with someone very soon, but because of what Sunday has done for me I can’t even think of any man again.

As my pastor said, it happened on one faithful day when I attended a seminar. I met Shola. After the seminar, he walk to me and introduced himself as Shola, I don’t even know what makes me attend to himself because am the type who don’t give a man any chance. Well! We started talking and he end up gaining my heart which makes me drop my number to him.

Seriously, there is something about Shola that is different, even I myself cannot explain. Can this man be the man that my pastor said I will meet? I kept on asking myself different questions. We became good friend, everyime am with Shola am always happy, whenever he calls I feel like have arrived and I and Sunday cannot discuss up to 20 minutes before we will be tired of ourselves. There is no romantic, nothing, nothing. Everything was just boring but he always gives me whatever I asked for.

One faithful day Shola and I engaged in a talk and he told me everything about himself. He was doing business and money is not coming yet. He was so opened to me, he told me every single thing about himself and he asked me to say the same thing which I did but I didn’t tell him that part of my boy friend. Anytime he asked about my boy friend I will just talk it over and we change the topic.

He was not even bother about it. What kind of man is this? Very free to everyone and very open but he has no money. According to him, he decides to work for himself after school, he said he believed in building his own business that instead of spending years in another person’s company he can spend just 10years to build his company from scratch and make it into millions within 10years.

Well…. Because am into business too, I didn’t discourage him but I know it will be hard for him especially when he has no one to help him.

One faithful day, Shola called me and told me that he has conviction about me that he will be happy if we can be in relationship. Are you mad? I quickly reply that. Haaaaa… what does this guy take me for? When I first visited him in his one bedroom face me and slap you I feel irritated because the environment was bad and for the fact that he is still staying in one room he can’t stand me. He begged me not to be annoyed and we forget everything.

He didn’t change his attitudes towards me and I loved been around him too because I always learn new thing anytime am with him. More importantly, I found happiness anytime am with him which I don’t find with Sunday.
Sometimes he will still talk about it but I warned him not to say that again if he doesn’t want our friendship to end. Seriously, Shola is the type I want, he have every characteristics I want in a man but he lack one thing which is money. He is a child of God, in fact! He can go to any length just to serve God with whatever he has but what about this financial aspect? Is zero.

I and Sunday begins to talk about marriage but I was not happy with it. Not because of the present condition but because I can see very well that we are not made to be together. I broke the news to Shola that am getting married. He cried and said something that really touched me that day. “Why do you want to marry someone you don’t love Toyin, when do you decides to leave the plan of God because am not rich?” what a hey is he talking about.

How did this guy know what am going through, how does he know that I don’t love this guy? I left his ghetto with annoyance and I send message to him that I don’t want to see him in my wedding. I even told him that I will use police to arrest him if I see him close to the venue and I deleted his number. I deleted every chat from him, every communication from him, I blocked it.

Something in me keeps on telling me that am doing something wrong. I shared it with Lara, she praised me that I did good thing. I can’t blame her because Sunday used to give her money too. How I wish I had a friend who have opposite side of Lara’s character then?

I and Sunday got married. Everyone was happy including my mummy but deep inside of me I was not happy. I didn’t see Shola, I was crying because Shola did not come to my wedding, and I caused it all. People thought I was crying because I wanted to leave my parents, they don’t know I was crying because I lose great person.

After reception I and Sunday went for our honeymoon for just 1 week because they only gave him 1 week. I don’t know how he managed to get that one week self.
Since the day we got back home from the honeymoon have never been happy. Sunday is the only annoyed husband have ever seen in my life. He will not play with me in the house; he will prefer to visit his friend and gist. But this man called himself a child of God then and I think he was. It was then I realized that I have missed my husband.

Sunday and I became cat and rat in the house. Sometimes he beat me, sometimes he talk to me and send me home. After 4 years of marriage he was fired from his job and he didn’t tell me what caused it, it was then I knew that my husband did not have money.

We now depend on my business and because I was not happy at home my business was not moving fine. We sold one of the car to reinvest it into my business but still, things did not work. My husband decides to be using the second car to work sometimes.

I was coming from the shop one day when the fuel finished from the danfo that I entered and everyone has to look for another bus to enter. I was beside the road stranded when an Avalon Toyota car passed me by and reversed back. Someone roll the glass down, you can’t believe who I saw. Shola was right there smiling at me. I shouted shola………. He came out of the car and hugs me. Hoo my God, for over 5years no one has ever hug me like this.

Shola did this because he was happy to see me again not because he was lust at me. He asked where I was going and I told him my house. We talked a lot and I saw a ring in his hand. I was happy for him but I was crying silently. I asked about his wife, he was happy to tell me about her, he even showed me her pictures and their 2years old kid.
He gave me his card with some change and they dropped me at the junction to my house.

The following morning I called him to thank him for the lift and the money he gave me. He was happy to hear my voice on the phone and he gave his wife phone to speak with me.

So, Shola told his wife everything about me? I can’t believe this. My husband has never come home to tell me what happen to him and Shola can tell his wife about his crush within 6hours.

I called him after like 4 days. I said I will like to visit him that there is something very important I want to tell him privately and he said I should come to his house that his wife will be traveling that morning. He gave me the address I went there. My eye saw something, I opened my mouth I can’t close it. Come and see mighty building where Shola and his family was living. I asked if they rented the place but I was surprised more on the answer he gave me.

He said this is my second house. I bought this one 6 months ago. Did you just say bought? I asked because I knew that house cannot worth less than 150 millions. Where did you find the money? He told me that after 2 weeks that we departed, he was introduced to a company to market for them and they saw good result, they now introduced him to another company in California that was how the money started coming.

I was crying. I begged him and I told him what happened, I told him what I was hiding about my relationship then.
So, Shola knows everything about my relationship! I can’t believe this. He said God convinced him about me that was the reason while he came to me. He said he knows the guy I was dating but he can see that we don’t love each other but he cannot force me.

He said God told him that He will provide a better option and God did. He told me everything, how he met his wife 7months after our departure, how they did their wedding, how he told his wife about me and everything. I was crying seriously and his wife walks into the sitting room.

Haaaaa…. But you said your wife traveled? I asked. Yes, because I knew you will not come and I can’t keep anything for my wife. Even if she is not here I will still tell her besides is wrong for you to come and meet me home when my wife is not around. Though I knew you very well before but I don’t know much about you now. Am sorry if I disappointed you!

His wife gave me handkerchief to clean my face and she hugs me. She was also crying seriously. I told them the problem am facing and they really pity me. Since that day, Shola has been helpful, he gave me money to invest in my business and we became family friends.

It took my husband’s months before he could believe that I and Shola are not having anything together. I admired Shola’s family even till now despite that my spiritual life has increased than before. There is nothing good like happy home oooo.

Maybe I forgot to tell you this; I always saying I don’t want to marry because of one stupid love when I was still single that all I need from a man is children. You won’t believe it that after many years in marriage we still begging God for a child.

Now! I understand that Love is very important in marriage; I understand that God should be involved in marriage; I understand that money has nothing to do with happy home; I understand that a man of Vision is better than a man of television. Shola is a man of vision but because of what Sunday have then I failed to marry Shola.

When the poverty got to some level in our life before I met Shola, my pastor told me that I have married wrongly that our star is not working together that it will take the grace of God and series of prayer for that marriage to work.
Am sharing this to you sir because I knew you have many followers. Please, let us take God first in our marriage. Am not saying Sunday is bad, but I knew myself that I married wrongly

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