(an article I posted in Weku)
I never use LinkedIn anymore.
I used to use it to communicate with my eldest sister who was living in Canada at the time. She has since moved back to South Africa.
For some reason I looked at LinkedIn as I was being congratulated for my work anniversary (I wasn't even aware of it, but I have been at this company for eight years now).
I looked at some old familiar names and I saw a conversation I had with my sister in June 2015. Here it is:
6/18/2015 Clem Human sent the following message at 10:53 AM
View Clem’s profile
Clem Human 10:53 AM
Hi Liz I am a very happy chappy, the visit to Dr Michaelis was great; just as the face of Helen of Troy launched a 1000 ships, the sight of my chubby cheeks has resulted in the cortisone pills being reduced by 2 daily after every 5 days, so the count down starts from 12, 10(now), 8, 6 etc. So not only peeing happily but less cortisone, can't get much better than that in my humble opinion! I even get thirsty now. I also chatted about the increasing weakness (effects of both the radiation after-effects and the cushioning (water retention)) - be patient is the message. Altered taste (can't enjoy my nasty smelly cheeses at the moment, even a lovely sharp cheddar is too much (the horror I have to endure), and don't even enjoy biltong, but I still enjoy my liquorice all-sorts! (yep, radiation the culprit but hopefully proper taste will be restored in due course); amazing how many things are taken for granted until gone or changed. I was too excited to even sleep properly last night but after sharing this news with you, I will pass onto the group now. lots of love Clem
Elizabeth Human 8:52 PM
This is good news. So you will be slim good intelligent humorous looker instead of a chubby cheeker! !!!. And feeling better into the bargain.. Am wondering if surgery will enter into the equation at all in the future. You are all held warmly in my thoughts and prayers. Love you Liz
It is quite personal but I use this forum as a type of digital journal. Maybe my kids will read this one day, who knows?
Several interesting things emerge which I had forgotten about, the terrible impact of the medicine, the quantities taken and my optimism.
(side effects = bad; long term effects = life!)
The most remarkable thing was the observation of my sister where she said "Am wondering if surgery will enter into the equation at all in future?" Well she certainly was correct as can be seen if the next article in this series.
So life is given to us "one day at a time". If I had known what I would have to endure in the future, would I still have had the courage and mindless optimism to continue?
(the battle I had when I had to get up all the stairs for the graduation is nice symbolism)
(sometimes we have to take a breather before continuing the battle up the stairs; same thing in life)
We all would love to know the future, but would we really want to? Blissful ignorance sometimes is much easier.
If I have to run a marathon, I will only consider where I am, taking small goals into consideration. I did that in the army, when we had to go for long runs on dusty dirt roads. I would set a target to run from this telephone pole to the next one, only that far to go! Then move my goal to the next pole. It is good to have long range and medium goals but sometimes in the heat of a difficult moment, we may have only enough courage and resources to have little goals. The little goals achieved will eventually add up into a big goal that will be a great success.
So at that time in June 2015, I did not know about the surgery, the embolism, and the terrible struggle to overcome addiction to various drugs, yet I endured all those things, one day at a time.
Makes you think doesn't it? Don't look too far ahead or we could lose courage, just look down at your feet and take one step at a time. Surely we can do that in life too?